CHILD’S HEALTH GENERAL BEHAVIOURAL PROBLEMS: TREATMENT AND PREVENTION OF TEMPER TANTRUMS
At times it is impossible to walk away from the child in the midst of a tantrum: for example, at other people’s houses or when shopping. It is still important that the behaviour not be reinforced. Suggested strategies for dealing with tantrums are outlined in a separate section on management of behaviour problems.
Sometimes the child can become quite frightened during a tantrum, probably because he feels out of control, and appears genuinely distressed. On these occasions you should simply hold the child for a few minutes, until he is back in control. Even during this period it is important not to reinforce the behaviour by being too warm and affectionate to the child. Furthermore, there should never be a reward for the child at the end of the temper tantrum. For example, a child may have a tantrum after his parents have insisted that he tidy up the toys, or perform another task. Once the tantrum is over and the child has regained composure, you should gently guide him back to the original task. If this is not done, then the child will very quickly learn that the way to avoid doing things is to have a temper tantrum.
If parents can manage a child’s temper tantrums correctly, then they will be able to manage successfully most of the other difficult behaviours that are an integral part of childhood. If they unwittingly allow the child to use repeated temper tantrums to get his own way, there is a good chance that the child will continue to use temper tantrums, or variations of them, as a way of relating to parents, other adults and peers. It will be likely to interfere with social learning, relationships and learning to deal with frustration.
You may want to speak to your doctor or another health professional to ‘coach’ you about behaviour management techniques. It is very often helpful to have somebody to support and encourage you during what is often a taxing time. Occasionally the family doctor will refer you and the child to a paediatrician or psychologist for more specialised advice.
Prevention
It is unlikely that temper tantrums can be totally prevented — they are a normal part of growing up. However, parents can certainly do much to make sure that they are not prolonged or made worse and that there are no associated behaviour problems, by handling the tantrums appropriately in the way suggested above. A commonsense, low key approach will usually work.
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